thehaitianqueen

2 days ago

This is my time…no…this is MY TIME!!!! PALANCE!!!!!!!!!!!

3 days ago

PSA- Help Haiti, OMEProductions clothing drive this Sunday!!

Notes: 6 / 3 weeks ago

I am overwhelmed. By the magnitude of this tragedy. By the images. By the pain my country is going through.

I am lucky, because all through the night, we had no idea what was happening. But at day break, my favorite time of the day, I received a call from my sister to tell me that she had heard my father’s voice for herself, that he was alive, and I just closed my eyes and prayed to God, and I cried and I rocked, because my father is one of my best friends on this earth, he is my hero, and it was unthinkable that I should imagine a life without him alive on this earth with me.

I am sad because just as I received these wonderful calls, proof that our loved ones were still alive and breathing on this earth, there were so many more who hadn’t received those calls. Even worse were the thoughts of those who knew their loved ones still lived, buried beneath this building or that, but there was no one to call and notify and please get my loved one out alive.

I’m blessed by all the phones calls and tweets and texts and facebook messages that I have received from people around me who care, who just want to extend their hands and touch and lend their support and just let me know that they are there.

I am tired of the news coverage, all the “poorest country in the western hemisphere” and “4th poorest country in the world” ‘s as if that’s all that defines a people, that’s all that mattered. I am angry, because everyone acts as if the European countries and the US didn’t spend years shutting us out of the global economic system, for fear that we would liberate their slaves, leaving us to fare as best we could, oh but look back now and we have no idea how this could have happened right?

Mostly I close my eyes and cry and pray and try not to think about what’s gonna happen when people stop thinking about this tragedy and what we are going to do when everyone goes back to not caring about Haiti.

Notes: 1 / 3 weeks ago

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Flaimahmy's post "Help Haiti"

A list of organizations to donate to- if you wish to help witg Haiti relief efforts.

3 weeks ago

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My sister just spoke to my father in Haiti- he’s in Petionville. I’m so relieved that all I could do is sit here and cry for a second. He said it was bad. Really bad.

Notes: 2 / 3 weeks ago

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The big day has arrived. — years ago today, my light first shown upon this world. I was born in a hospital on the North Shore of Long Island. I had a head full of curly Afro & my parents had to carry me home days later through 6 feet of snow.

This year my birthday has been a mini-social tour. Rather than having just one big party, I’ve been going to as many little parties as I can get my hands on, having dinner and drinks with individual friends and family, just generally doing it up at every chance I get. It’s been a good time.

Cause what can you do? You are going to get a little older. Celebrate if not for yourself, than for your mama’s accomplishment in having you. Your are here, alive and breathing. Celebrate that!

4 weeks ago from nonprofitblogs

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New York and San Francisco Use Condoms as Evidence of Prostitution

nonprofitblogs:

Thursday, I pointed out that police in D.C., which has the highest rate of HIV/AIDS in the country, are reported to use possession of condoms as evidence of sex work. (Yeah, they…

Notes: 1 / 1 month ago

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2010 so far…

My Cleanse: I’ve gotten to that point in the cleanse where everything is coming up. My skin was extra itchy for several days and now I’m blowing my nose constantly. It feels good because I am giving my body a chance to clean itself from the inside out, anything that might have been clinging to me all this time is losing a foothold, and with a lot of water and patience it will all have to disappear. It’s exciting.

The first time I did a cleanse, I held on for seven weeks and I felt amazing afterwards. People still comment on how healthy and vibrant I seemed. Of course they hasten to try and reassure me that I don’t look unhealthy or anything now, but I understand. I can feel the difference inside myself. I realize through this process how sluggish I’ve become, how used to being weighed down I am. Slowly I’m letting all that stuff float up and away.

Less time on twitter/facebook: I take my social networking time in short little bursts. Once or twice a day, usually in the “off” hours (6am, 3am), I will log on and interact with my peoples. The rest of the time I harness the energy and channel it towards my notebook or reading. Sometimes those thoughts will still make it onto twitter, but sometimes it just doesn’t seem important enough to share. It’s forcing me to really temper my words and realize that it’s not necessary to share ALL my thoughts. Liberating.

Daily Mediation: Fabulous. I read a passage from my Vanzant book every day. I also experiment with chanting, using Om (which I pronounce A-U-Mmmmm) and a sanskrit phrase from my Deepak Chopra book (there’s a different phrase every day). I’m still not sure what I’m doing sometimes, and it can feel silly. Other times, I will be lying in bed, drifting off and I will recall a sound from mediation and repeat it over and over in my head and it will bring me peace. There are occasional 1 second bursts of clarity, too quick for me to grasp and hold onto, but they give me hope because I know that they are there.

Daily Yoga: I try to start my day with a sun salutation sequence, and then I will grab a few of the poses from Bikram and do those as well. I keep forgetting to do Shavasana or Dead Man’s Pose, which I have been taught is necessary in all yoga practice. I figure I will get there eventually. At least I’m moving and getting my blood flowing. I feel the strength returning to my arms, it’s all the Downward Dogs that I have been doing! LOL

Writing Journey: I have started a new journal for the new year. Although I have developed a habit of writing everyday, it hasn’t been journaling, something that I have done since I was in the second grade. When I look back I find it strange that I went 1 year without keeping a diary. My last diary was full of so much sadness that I questioned the wisdom of holding onto these memories so tightly. Maybe we aren’t meant to record these things, maybe we are meant to forget, to let things go?

But in all things I am a writer, and it is easier to process my thoughts when I am trying to organize them so that they can be recorded. Also, I realize that I have been denying myself a certain amount of alertness about the circumstances in my life by not reviewing and recording them. Lastly, how will I ever write a proper memoir if I don’t review my day/week/month and write it down? LOL

1 month ago

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The 5 Stages of Grief

Denial — “I feel fine.”; “This can’t be happening, not to me.”
Denial is usually only a temporary defense for the individual. This feeling is generally replaced with heightened awareness of situations and individuals that will be left behind after death.
Anger — “Why me? It’s not fair!”; “How can this happen to me?”; “Who is to blame?”
Once in the second stage, the individual recognizes that denial cannot continue. Because of anger, the person is very difficult to care for due to misplaced feelings of rage and envy. Any individual that symbolizes life or energy is subject to projected resentment and jealousy.
Bargaining — “Just let me live to see my children graduate.”; “I’ll do anything for a few more years.”; “I will give my life savings if…”
The third stage involves the hope that the individual can somehow postpone or delay death. Usually, the negotiation for an extended life is made with a higher power in exchange for a reformed lifestyle. Psychologically, the individual is saying, “I understand I will die, but if I could just have more time…”
Depression — “I’m so sad, why bother with anything?”; “I’m going to die … What’s the point?”; “I miss my loved one, why go on?”
During the fourth stage, the dying person begins to understand the certainty of death. Because of this, the individual may become silent, refuse visitors and spend much of the time crying and grieving. This process allows the dying person to disconnect oneself from things of love and affection. It is not recommended to attempt to cheer up an individual who is in this stage. It is an important time for grieving that must be processed.
Acceptance — “It’s going to be okay.”; “I can’t fight it, I may as well prepare for it.”
This final stage comes with peace and understanding of the death that is approaching. Generally, the person in the fifth stage will want to be left alone. Additionally, feelings and physical pain may be non-existent. This stage has also been described as the end of the dying struggle.

1 month ago

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“When Job’s three friends […] heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.”

-Job 2: 11-13

Now that’s true friendship.

Notes: 2 / 1 month ago

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In 2010 I resolve to:

waste less time (make my social networking time -e.g. facebook, twitter- shorter and more meaningful)
develop/continue my daily yoga practice
develop/continue my daily meditation/prayer practice
purposefully continue my writing journey

In 2010 I wish to:

spend more time in the Bikram studio
be more careful/caring of/with my body
play more mas than 2009
go alone to a silent yoga retreat

In 2010 I am:

no longer afraid to be with myself
no longer afraid of silence
a better writer and a more attentive reader
more careful and purposeful with my mind/thoughts and my words

Notes: 2 / 1 month ago from gauntlet

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"

In an article provocatively entitled “My Four Husbands and I”, Nadine al-Bedair quite sensibly posed the logical question: if Muslim men are entitled to marry up to four wives, why can’t women, in the spirit of equality between believers, have four husbands?

“I have long questioned why it is men have a monopoly on this right. No one has been able to explain to me convincingly why it is I’m deprived of the right to polyandry,” she complains.

The outspoken Saudi then goes on to deconstruct and question the traditional justifications for polygamy, including that, in a traditional patriarchal society, it is a shelter for widows, divorcees and women who can’t find a spouse; that men have greater sexual appetites than women and get easily bored; that women can’t handle more than one man; and that, if women could have multiple husbands, determining paternity would not be possible (an excuse made obsolete by modern science).

"

- More here (via gauntlet)

1 month ago from bookmarklet

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SOF: Approaching Prayer [Speaking of Faith® from American Public Media]

I just spent an enlightening hour listening to one of my favorite NPR shows Speaking of Faith. Today’s show was about approaching prayer, and it was an examination of prayer from 3 different religious traditions/perspective. Timely because one of my resolutions is about meditation/prayer, and my daily mediation today is devoting time to thinking about God.

Notes: 1 / 1 month ago from bookmarklet

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Perfect Brown Rice - Saveur.com

I have finally cooked the perfect pot of brown rice without resorting to Success Rice by using the above recipe. I did however, cut the amount of water in half, using 6 cups of water per cup of rice, rather than 12. Prior to finding this recipe, I would only manage to cook brown rice successfully in my pelau.

Notes: 1 / 1 month ago

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“If you are kicking that shit from your heart, then you can go wherever your heart wants you to go”
-Tupac Shakur

Recently I spent some time contemplating the life of Tupac Shakur. I watched Thug Angel (The Life of an Outlaw) and thought about his words, his life and his message. I truly believe that the day he died, we lost a prophet, and a potential future leader of my generation.

“The one thing Pac taught me is just be yourself…and the rest, it will come”
-Shock G, Digital Underground

I am struck by how foolish older black folk seem in retrospect. So focused on “the glorious days of protests in the 60’s”, they failed to recognize the reality of which Tupac spoke. They failed and still fail to recognize the richness of the black experience in America. For better or for worse, we all experience “different Americas”, and none of those should be discounted. We cannot fear to speak out on what we know and see, because it flies in the face of some tradition,doesn’t encourage black unity or it’s just too rude.

What I loved about Tupac was his contradiction. He had his poetry and his gansta rap. He had love for females, but at the same time perceived some to be “bitches” and “hos”. He was violent, young and “didn’t give a fuck”, but at the same time, he cared about people in his community, and he reached back for brothers and tried to show them a better way. Nothing in a human life is strictly linear, and if you try to restrict your life in a linear manner, then you are not really living. He made it ok to be a contradiction, life itself is a contradiction.

He had so much to say. He wrote so many songs and so much poetry, it’s astounding to me sometimes that he only lived to see 25.

Tupac makes me try to listen to the hip-hop of today, try to hear the message that youth wish to impart upon us. Sadly, I perceive much of it to be empty, mindless, materialistic drivel. What am I missing? Is this today’s black youth’s only focus in life? Most importantly, did Tupac’s death scare off or stop the development of other prophets?

I really don’t know what the answer is. But Tupac inspires me to be true to myself, to hold onto my innermost thoughts and feelings and expose them to the light. To hold myself and my opinions as having value in the world, as needing to be heard. To not be afraid to be who I am, people be damned. If you don’t like it, well, there’s not much that I can do for you. Cause I’m kicking that shit from my heart, and therefore I can go where ever my heart wants me to go.

The 5 Stages of Grief

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